Written Saturday...
This morning Benno and I are rushing around. Our alarm did not go off and we are supposed to be ready to head up to Semonkong with some friends. We are supposed to be leaving at 4:45 a.m. and it is 4:15!
I'm thrown together and head downstairs to gather the things I'd packed. Something is wrong. I'm confused. I'm uncertain, yet certain. My computer that I'd left out in the dining room has vanished. It IS gone.
I wander around the main level of the house...thinking...confused...It IS gone. It's not just that Benno stuck it away for me. A few other tiny details are the only clues. Someone has come into our house while we were sleeping and has taken my computer--nothing else of any value--leaving something else VERY VALUABLE that I'd carelessly left out. (Hmmm...yes...my purse with my Passport!) How strange. Maybe it had just not been noticed--HUGE mercies!
I feel so strange and not sure what to think. The trip to Semonkong was cancelled, at that moment, for us and we are left here to try to make sense of this. I am devastated. My computer is so important to me. All my pictures--all my pictures of home, my family, my friends, life here...my work here...all my planning...all my MARKS! SO MUCH!
The worse thing about theft like this is that it not only means the loss of possessions, but unfortunately the loss of trust. We'll have to deal with that one...We'll need some wisdom, discernment...
Today...Wednesday...
I have crashed. I'm NOT dealing with this well. I feel so invaded and so helpless. I NEED my information. Loss of information is causing me great frustration. My reports. Exams and marking schemes. Pictures of students. Students' work that THEY will now have to redo. Yes, I KNOW, we are all supposed to BACK UP information, and most of this is, but not all. And it's just so inconvenient and time consuming.
Strange to have this occurrence juxtaposed against my last Blog entry. You know, we are NOT wealthy, and we do think twice about how we spend money! In terms of "material assets" our old car here, my laptop, Benno's laptop...that's pretty much it. And, the thing is, having that laptop stolen is not such a big deal to me. I think I relinquished my need for material things quite a while ago: it's the information I've lost, the invasion of privacy, the invasion and the loss of trust.
I just feel like crawling into a cave and hiding, which is what I'm doing right now--kind of--psychologically. I want a miracle--that somehow I will get my laptop back, but I know that that is not going to happen. The police have done...well...as much as they can/will here. I 'll have to deal with this and do some emotional re-wiring I guess...step-by-step.
~ Wendy ~
Saturday, 8 November 2008
Monday, 3 November 2008
The Ocean of Disparity
Perspective is EVERYTHING. About a month ago I lost my runners at the gym, and I just could not spend the big bucks to replace them, even though I knew I would have to. It just broke my heart to think about spending that kind of money. Besides, I'd just spent a big wad on taking some students down to Kwa Zulu Natal.
Time passed, however, and the chronic pain I suffer when I am out of an exercise routine began to get worse and worse. Once it got to two extra-strength painkillers and a hot shower to get me moving in the morning, I'd had enough and went and spent the money. At least I bought 'this side'-- in Lesotho, that is -- supporting the local economy.
But goodness! A month's wages for the average Masotho? Can you imagine paying a month's wages for a pair of running shoes? My mind is blown away by the thought, but truly, Maluti 820 is what I spent. By today's exchange rate that's $97.50 Canadian; hence, not a bad price for a pair of GOOD running shoes; and if one is doing lots of running, that is what is needed. The dollar conversion, though? That means that the average Masotho earns just under $100. per MONTH. That's not DAY--that's month. Can you imagine spending the average Canadian monthly salary on a pair of shoes?
Inequities are mind blowing! Eeish... I don't even know what to say. Dear God help me make sense of it all--help me get a glimpse of your perspective.
Then tonight Benno and I return the dress I'd been loaned so generously by 'M'e Lerato, along with a small gift of thanks and some cookies I'd baked. As 'M'e Lerato walks back to the car with us she is dancing and celebrating because this Wednesday there will be a big celebration at Beautiful Gate, where she is working, and she is THRILLED because this means she will get to eat MEAT!
I think about the steak that I was chewing down before I headed out to her place. I think about my full cupboards and fridge.
Now, I just need to stop thinking for a bit because the inequities wash over me and I'm swept out into an ocean of uncertainties. I feel like I'm floating in an ocean, far from shore, over my head...
Time passed, however, and the chronic pain I suffer when I am out of an exercise routine began to get worse and worse. Once it got to two extra-strength painkillers and a hot shower to get me moving in the morning, I'd had enough and went and spent the money. At least I bought 'this side'-- in Lesotho, that is -- supporting the local economy.
But goodness! A month's wages for the average Masotho? Can you imagine paying a month's wages for a pair of running shoes? My mind is blown away by the thought, but truly, Maluti 820 is what I spent. By today's exchange rate that's $97.50 Canadian; hence, not a bad price for a pair of GOOD running shoes; and if one is doing lots of running, that is what is needed. The dollar conversion, though? That means that the average Masotho earns just under $100. per MONTH. That's not DAY--that's month. Can you imagine spending the average Canadian monthly salary on a pair of shoes?
Inequities are mind blowing! Eeish... I don't even know what to say. Dear God help me make sense of it all--help me get a glimpse of your perspective.
Then tonight Benno and I return the dress I'd been loaned so generously by 'M'e Lerato, along with a small gift of thanks and some cookies I'd baked. As 'M'e Lerato walks back to the car with us she is dancing and celebrating because this Wednesday there will be a big celebration at Beautiful Gate, where she is working, and she is THRILLED because this means she will get to eat MEAT!
I think about the steak that I was chewing down before I headed out to her place. I think about my full cupboards and fridge.
Now, I just need to stop thinking for a bit because the inequities wash over me and I'm swept out into an ocean of uncertainties. I feel like I'm floating in an ocean, far from shore, over my head...
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