Friends (Thabana Li-Mele Reprise)

For two weekends in May I spent some time with ‘friends’. What are friends? Friendship here can take on a different hue. It is easy to be a bit uncertain about friendships, at least when it comes to our Basotho friends. In many ways it is an unequal relationship. I have so much -, opportunity and resources. They have so little - materially. There is so often the temptation to cynically ask, “Do they really want to be a friend, or do they see me as just a means to possible material gain.” It is a question that so often clouds my mind, but those two weekends in May have offered me a different perspective. Yes, friends are those whose company I enjoy and who enjoy doing things I do. However, what I was reminded these two weekends is that friends are those whose presence enriches my life.

The initial May activity was a planned hike with my niece, Jillian. We would climb Thabana Li-Mele, a hike that Wendy and I had done some months back. Bokang, our Sesotho guide would be along, but why drive out with only three in the car. (Wendy was busy with something else.) I knew of others who were interested in climbing the mountain. So many Basotho only know about things in their country, but it is us foreigners that get to experience them. So I filled up the spare seats (plus one) in my car with Basotho ‘friends’. Though the forecast promised rain, we were undeterred and off we went.

Our goal, the twin peaks, shrouded in cloud.

This was a 7 hour hike with a significant elevation gain. Amongst our troupe was a twenty-six year old mother of two. It was delightful having her out front, leading the way and calling back when she needed directions. We literally had to put a pack on her back to slow her down so we could keep up. Then there was a couple. Their home village lies beyond the mountain, and they could hardly believe that they were climbing the mountain that they had looked at so often, doing something they had never dreamed of doing but quietly thrilled that they were.

A loving husband tending to sore feet.

Approaching the second summit peak.

The sun peaked out now and then to encourage us on the trek up, and then the clouds parted and we spent a few glorious minutes in the sun at the top. The rain finally caught up with us on the way down, but even trudging through a light drizzle for the last hour did not dampen their spirits. The mother of two was actually doing a little dance when the drizzle let up and we were nearly back to our starting point.

Goofy gals celebrating at the top.

The summit view.
We started down near the center of the picture.

The contentment and quiet enjoyment I felt, watching and listening to their delight and pleasure … maybe they should be questioning my motives for hanging around with them.

Then a couple weekends later, Jillian and I visited the rural village, 80 kilometres (but three hours driving) out of Maseru where the couple mentioned above are from. (The source of my ‘Village Vignettes’ photos.) It was a great two days. The ‘store’, where we gathered maize and pumpkin, was a fifty minute hike away. Nearly as far the women gathered firewood. Ah, but the joys. The extended family includes two small boys. One quietly took my hat, and made it his. Luckily Jillian had brought some gifts from Canada, and I was able to get my hat back for one she brought from Canada. The other was a little shadow, but always ready to help. The pace of life in the village is certainly slower, and the simple pleasures I derived from just being and sharing time with this gracious family enriched my soul.

Jillian with a cool kid.


Hat one.


Hat two.


Our gracious hosts.

So what is friendship? If it is being enriched by time spent together, then any small material gain my friends realize from hanging around with me is more than compensated by the joy and pleasure I experience spending time with them and enjoying their presence. My life is rich beyond compare.

~ Benno ~

(Post Script: Even before the stiff and sore muscles had healed, the hikers were considering another hike, Thabana Ntlenyana - the highest point in Southern Africa at 3482 metres. But the elevation gain will be less than Thabana Li-Mele as in that area the road runs through mountain passes over 3200 metres.)