The great dilemma

Should teachers get personally involved in the lives of their students? This is a common dilemma in the profession.

In my current situation, I am getting personally involved in the lives of my students—often—and this is my only answer:

I do recall some sage advice I received a while back when someone suggested that he had learned, in his study of psychology, that it is important to help people but not to get personally involved. There is wisdom in this advice—I cannot deny that—because common sense would tell us that it would be so easy to get ‘burned out’ emotionally by getting too involved in the lives of all the people we serve, but I have come to see things somewhat differently. Although I realize that the advice is sound, and that it would be impossible emotionally to take on the burdens of many, that, as a Christian, God calls me to get personally involved in the lives of at least some.

What would have happened if God had decided, “We need to help out these people that we’ve created, so go do what you can, Jesus, but don’t get too personally involved”? The ultimate sacrifice was to get totally personally involved by having Christ Jesus go through the ultimate experience of pain. He took on all of human pain in the ultimate experience of human suffering: his death on the cross.

The weight of sin’s result leads to every form of human suffering. When people say to me, “How could a God of love allow such an extent of human suffering as we see on this earth?” my response is that God did not create human suffering; God did create people will a free will and hence we have chosen to create suffering for ourselves—it is the pain that we bring upon ourselves and each other through our choices that is the epitome of all suffering.

Hence comes the cross. As a pacifist, I have always—always—struggled with a God of love requiring such a horrific sacrifice, but I have finally come to understand. It is the ultimate act of showing personal involvement that a God who is totally pure and who does not need to carry any of our pain, should take on every bit of it—should be totally personally involved. How else could a God of love show love for us? If He had done anything less, there would be people who could TRULY say, “God could not possibly relate to what I’m going through. Where is God in this?”

So, following this example, when Jesus instructs: “Take up my cross, daily, and follow me,” the implication is that I DO get personally involved in the pain of others, and not just when I have time or when it is appropriate, but daily, when the pain confronts me. The pain of others IS the cross that Jesus speaks of because that is what He took on. There is no other way to explain this instruction of Christ.

But there is a paradox in this pain because as Christ gives us this instruction, He also promises to send us a Comforter as we carry these loads of pain. What I am discovering is that this promise is so true! It seems to me that as I see the pain and suffering that others bear, these are the crosses of Jesus that I am called to carry—to offer to bear at least some of the weight with my brothers and sisters on this earth. According to psychology, carrying others crosses would not be wise, would it? Yet the paradox I discover is the mystery of the Holy Spirit’s empowering. If I DON’T take up these crosses daily and follow Christ, in my life I experience far more pain that if I DO help to carry the burdens of others. Yes, there is no doubt that the loads are heavy but that somehow the act of helping to carry brings a sense of peace. It is strange, perhaps, but with all the extent of my direct involvement in my student’s lives and in the lives of others around me, I have a much greater sense of fulfillment and peace.

Perhaps it is partly because, how else could I ever answer the question, “Where is God in all of this?” If I can see, feel, and say that God is with US—in US--that we are His hands and feet—his arms to reach out and wrap around those in pain—then I at least have an answer to that question. The answer is that WE have created pain through our choices—we are stuck with pain as long as we live on this earth, but through the perfect example of Jesus, we have been shown a better way through this pain-filled existence--that we are called to help each other and as we do so, the pain is lessened for them and for us. It is through this relationship of love that we cope.