I’m at home today, typing a blog entry (the previous one) and somehow over the noise of my music and my focus on ‘the story’ unfolding before me, I hear the faint sound of a rattle that usually signifies someone come to visit, kind of like our North American doorbell, you know?
“Thabiso! Where HAVE you been? We WERE worried about you. Would you like to come in (Eeish, Wendy, he didn’t come all this way to just rattle the gate. Really! And he looks so sad.) […A quick inward sigh and an outward smile. Smiles help me…]
Thabiso is the young man (19) that came by the gate a while back. He and his two younger sisters have been orphaned for a year. One of many child-headed households in Lesotho, Thabiso’s is a pretty desperate one; no doubt we don’t really begin to know just HOW desperate… Thabiso and his sisters had disappeared for over a month. The last Benno knew, they were facing potential eviction because they could not make the rent payments. Thabiso has two years left in high school and has been trying to be a student while working to provide for the family.
As Thabiso and I visit over some lunch he tells me that they did get evicted and are currently living in a place for M80 per month. A rental fee of just over $10.00 Canadian a month? Does it create images of JUST how bad that place must be? It does for me.
“Thabiso! Where HAVE you been? We WERE worried about you. Would you like to come in (Eeish, Wendy, he didn’t come all this way to just rattle the gate. Really! And he looks so sad.) […A quick inward sigh and an outward smile. Smiles help me…]
Thabiso is the young man (19) that came by the gate a while back. He and his two younger sisters have been orphaned for a year. One of many child-headed households in Lesotho, Thabiso’s is a pretty desperate one; no doubt we don’t really begin to know just HOW desperate… Thabiso and his sisters had disappeared for over a month. The last Benno knew, they were facing potential eviction because they could not make the rent payments. Thabiso has two years left in high school and has been trying to be a student while working to provide for the family.
As Thabiso and I visit over some lunch he tells me that they did get evicted and are currently living in a place for M80 per month. A rental fee of just over $10.00 Canadian a month? Does it create images of JUST how bad that place must be? It does for me.
“How are you getting by, Thabiso? Do you have food?” Some maize meal is about it, and I tend to believe him. So far, as Benno has checked his story, everything he has been telling us is true.
“How’d you like that thunderstorm last night, Thabiso?”
“Not so much, 'M'e. When it rains, our roof leaks.”
[I’m just sitting there, going through the motions, trying to lighten the situation a bit with my weird humor. I am so, so, so overwhelmed by it all—by the realization that Thabiso is only one of many, many desperate young people and children. I am so overwhelmed as I look into his eyes and read the pain in his soul and the strength in his spirit. Even in despair he is so dignified and seems determined to survive. His voice catches and stumbles, curbing the tears, and this is no “put on behavior”. Oh yes, cynicism is my constant companion—under the surface where I hope it is hid. ‘Everyone’ is needy here and many want help from people like us. We feel so strongly about ensuring that we help appropriately, and that we help the RIGHT starfish.]
I think of the orphanage I visited yesterday and don’t even want to mention that as a solution…
“How’d you like that thunderstorm last night, Thabiso?”
“Not so much, 'M'e. When it rains, our roof leaks.”
[I’m just sitting there, going through the motions, trying to lighten the situation a bit with my weird humor. I am so, so, so overwhelmed by it all—by the realization that Thabiso is only one of many, many desperate young people and children. I am so overwhelmed as I look into his eyes and read the pain in his soul and the strength in his spirit. Even in despair he is so dignified and seems determined to survive. His voice catches and stumbles, curbing the tears, and this is no “put on behavior”. Oh yes, cynicism is my constant companion—under the surface where I hope it is hid. ‘Everyone’ is needy here and many want help from people like us. We feel so strongly about ensuring that we help appropriately, and that we help the RIGHT starfish.]
I think of the orphanage I visited yesterday and don’t even want to mention that as a solution…
“How is school going? How did exams go? (He was under a lot of pressure right then, so I hunch that they didn't go as well as he would have liked. How could they?) How are your sisters doing? What do you have for food? … The questions fill the pregnant silence that I am not good at dealing with.
“I hope you don’t mind me asking all these questions. I am really just very curious…babble, babble ;-) “ I DO manage to get a couple of smiles from him, so it’s worth it—tentative ones. His teachers tell him that he is very quiet and that he seems to be carrying a heavy burden… Yes, he exudes an emotional tiredness that I have only seen in those who are grieving, who have lost someone or who are going through deep waters.
“Thabiso, can you come back tomorrow evening when Ntate Benno is home so we can talk more about how to help you?"
I give him a few groceries and some money. God, please let this be the right thing to do. How could it be wrong? I feel inept, overwhelmed, uncertain yet certain...Give me wisdom. Give me discernment, God.
“Thabiso, when you first came to our place, why did you come HERE? You could have gone anywhere in Maseru? … Do you think God directed you here…I don’t know, I just wonder?”
“Thabiso, can you come back tomorrow evening when Ntate Benno is home so we can talk more about how to help you?"
I give him a few groceries and some money. God, please let this be the right thing to do. How could it be wrong? I feel inept, overwhelmed, uncertain yet certain...Give me wisdom. Give me discernment, God.
“Thabiso, when you first came to our place, why did you come HERE? You could have gone anywhere in Maseru? … Do you think God directed you here…I don’t know, I just wonder?”
~Wendy~
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